| 13 October 2011
After our triple bypass brought on by last week’s game, we’re finally out of the hospital and ready to go!
A surprisingly important game at Wake Forest this week. Should we not go crazy talking about how much they always suck?
HA! This is the NEZ, not EveryoneGetsaTrophy.com, so let’s light this candle after the jump…
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Non-Metallica Pump-Up Song of the Week
Per Maniak, this had to be done. Logan Thomas the Tank Engine is back, baby!
My favorite lyric?
Graduated from booze…
I’m in a 50-year program. It’s gonna be a loooong time until I graduate.
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First thing’s first… HOLY SHIT WHAT A GAME!
The Tank Engine is back!
Let’s just forget the horrible second half our defense put out there, and concentrate on the positive.
That place was INSANELY loud. If you have Facebook, you’ve seen the same video that all your friends posted.
Mike Patrick was beside himself at what he was witnessing during the final minute.
Unfortunately, your humble editor was watching at home. So with one play left, Miami calls a timeout. I look at Poppa Gally and say, “Oh man, that was stupid. I bet they’ll start playing…” And boom. The guitar riff we all know.
As predicted, the place went crazy.
Then we won. And there is nothing better than drinking Miami's tears...
It was like the Nebraska game without the horrible offense for 3 ½ quarters.
So Miami? Go screw yourself. 7 out of the last 9. We’ve got your swagger right here.
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The Bad Guys
Not gonna lie, we tried. We really did. We looked everywhere for something to write about this team. But we have nothing.
Does anyone think Bud Foster isn’t gonna have this defense chomping at the bit? You might as well name their quarterback “Henchman #3”.
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The Good Guys
Logan Thomas… he’s back.
Well, I guess there’s some debate as to if he was ever really there. But he has certainly earned his nickname back.
The Tank Engine is running on full steam, with DMFW as the engineer.
But our defense? Yeesh. Five touchdown drives in a row. If we didn't have the best defensive coach in the country, we'd be kind of worried. But as it stands, we DO have the best defensive coach in the world.
Thus, no worries. We got this shit.
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The Game
We’re going to use this portion to talk about our coaching during the Miami game.
Some people may think we’re ready to concede that our coaches know what they are doing. But you could not be further from the truth.
Wow, we ran some misdirection and employed basic offensive strategy. OMFG!!!
Again, we have some of the best athletes on offense in the ACC, and we finally called the right plays to let them show it. Well, until the last drive, where were ran the ball 3 straight downs and the Tank Engine bailed us out with a QB draw on 4th down.
One decent game does not a good offensive coordinator make. We have the exact same doubts we had before. We’re just more confident in our athletes ability to overcome our coaches’ awfulness.
Anyways, this game? It’s gonna be 70% Hokie fans in the stadium. We got this. Retire to your nerderies with your calculators.
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Zombie Kill of the Week
Two weeks in a row? D_w is a freaking MACHINE!
Well this is two weeks in a row.. look at that.. managed to scrape together enough time between fall weddings to put a low rent video together for this week's Zombie Kill. Oh and speaking of fall weddings I was at one instead of being at the game but it had a surprise twist... 2 hours to kill between ceremony and reception so guess who found the nearest sports bar (BDubs ) and camped out for the watch the second half of the Hokies game.. I'll give you a hint, he has writes for The Northendzone.com (sometimes) and looks better than C.Gally, yep you guessed it... THIS GUY! This week's kill goes to Logan Thomas the Tank Engine... again. This kid is a monster, this week he spies a little DB and decides to take him and his friend for a ride straight to a first down.
Well you know what sums that video up nicely... Sucks To Be.. #31 and #26 for Miami.. Thought I was going to go with the easy t-shirt line didn't you?
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Avid Reader Comment of the Week
With all the hate that goes on around this site, we’d like to talk about something that we love: Reader Comments.
Why do we love them? For many reasons:
1. We know that people other than our parents are reading.
2. We don’t have to come up with funny content on our own (always a bad idea)
3. The comments are usually funnier than anything we could think up.
This week’s award goes to avid reader IllinoisHokie for his response to The Northerner’s great vacuuming rant:
So apparently "shit" isn't offensive enough to need a substitute word?
Take a breath. Sean Glennon? That's just crazy talk right there.
Shit is perfectly acceptable. Speaking of shit, The Northerner probably went over the line saying he missed Glennon. Let us not forget how incredibly terrible he was.
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Hokie Motivator of the Week
Each week, the Carnegie Mellon Football Analyst submits his own Hokie Motivator. This week...
...he phones it in. But dammit, we love it. The Demon Deacon sucks.
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Hilarious Video that has nothing to do with the game of the Week
This may not be Lil John approved, and is DEFINITELY not boss approved.
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Gratuitous Dumb and Dumber Quote of the WeekYes, we're stealing this straight from Deadspin's Jamboroo. No, we don't care.
Lloyd: I'll tell you where. Someplace warm. A place where the beer flows like wine. Where beautiful women instinctively flock like the salmon of Capistrano. I'm talking about a little place called… Aspen.
Harry: Oh, I don't know, Lloyd. The French are assholes.
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Replacement Voldemort of the Week
The Demon Deacons.
You know who we need.
A man that knows what he’s doing with the demons.
Father Karras
The power of Christ compels you... to call something other than draw plays.
Here’s hoping that he is the shit.
LET’S GO HOKIES!!
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