Yes, I know this is of UGA, but it's the only picture I could find.  Back off.

Central Michigan University?  Really?  Alright, let's get this over with.

CGally takes the team associated with his beloved baseball team, and so will I.  However, my hate towards Boston College has nothing to do with the Red Sox.  It has everything to do with them being terrible.

Ok, let’s play some catch up. This whole “real life” thing is really a pain in the ass. We’re going to push Boise St. until closer to game time. Up now: East Carolina.

We have documented before our reasons to hate ECU. Oh, wait. We don’t really have anything against them? Oh...

Even though we they beat us two years ago, we hold more hatred towards the misuse of timeouts and deplorable play calling. They also went on to beat WVU that year, which made us pretty darn happy.

So I guess the worst thing I can say about them is that they are the Pirates. And good lord, do I hate any team named the Pirates.

Would you like to know why??? Of course you would.

As the Northerner documented last week, it’s been 18 years since my favorite baseball team had a winning season. College freshmen have never seen the Pirates win 82 games in a season.

And this isn’t some shitty expansion team either. They’ve won 5 World Series, which ties them for 6^th all-time. In 1991, they had the starting outfield in the All-Star Game. This is… well, WAS a great franchise with a rabid following.

Look, I’m not asking for much. I know we can’t consistently compete with the Yankees every year. But holy lord, just one winning season? Please? Give me some kind of hope!

I don’t exactly know what the problem is, but I’m sure if your team has ever done something wrong, the Pirates have done it wrong twice as often and twice as bad.

The Pittsburgh Pirates have ruined the sport of baseball for a guy that LOVED the game as a kid.They should be ashamed.

It came without pomp and circumstance, but the Pirates have secured the 18th losing season in a row.  Someone make sure CGally isn't alone tonight.

Against all odds and advice, we were recently asked to join the Brian Cook's BlogPoll.

We're not going to lie, this is a pretty safe first ballot. It's the preseason poll, and we're happy to admit we don't know jack about most of the teams yet. We'll get around to reading that Oregon St. preview one of these days.

But let us know what you think. We'll judge by deafening silence that we're exactly on the money.

And yeah, we have Tech at #5 instead of #6. Figure it out.

Apologies

Yeah yeah, we know, we suck at this posting thing. But with the Northerner on vacation and your humble editor busy, it was tough to get everything in. What was I busy with? Well....

Announcements

Your humble editor is leaving the lovely DC area and heading back to grad school. Where might you ask? Well, as we all know, UVA has a pretty well-regarded business school. Soooo... this is kind of awkward....

BAAAAH! Just kidding. Your humble editor has decided to move to the 2nd greatest city in the country (next to Blacksburg, of course) and become a Fighting Calculator at Carnegie Mellon in Pittsburgh.

It's been great being in DC, and I will really miss the hilarity that is Redskins football. I will also miss witnessing first-hand the yearly devastation of Capitals fans. But most of all, I'll miss being surrounded by Hokies.

But fear not! I shall return often, for I've really grown fond of ridiculous Metro fares and unbelievable traffic. I won't be able to stay away.

Announcements 2.0

We have more RMFW shirts coming!

The response has been incredible, and we couldn't be happier about it! So get your orders in, and we'll hook you up as soon as we get them in. Again, they are a whopping $10 (plus $2 if we need to ship them). Send us an email at  This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it . We'll work out the sizes and everything with you.

Also, big thanks to the HokieGuru. The dude is probably responsible for 80% of the sales we've had.

HateFest Schedule

Ok, the free-for-all was fun, but let's get down to business.

We will be going through our schedule this season, starting with Boise State of course. So here's our tentative plan:

• This week: Boise St., East Carolina, Boston College
• Next week:  NC State, Central Michigan (ha), Wake Forest, Duke
• Last week of the offseason: Georgia Tech, North Carolina, Miami, UVA

Here he is boys and girls.  Enjoy.

Can you believe that there are still people like this out there? That’s like not knowing we landed on the moon.

What really irks me is that they STILL use all the lines. FOR-EV-ER. You’re killing me, Smalls! Do you want a s’more? Yet they have no idea where the phrases came from.

I mean, did your parents hate you? Did they not want you to have a decent childhood? It’s arguably the greatest sports movie of all time, and is CERTAINLY the greatest kids’ movie.

So if you haven’t seen the Sandlot, go spend $5 and get a VCR and a VHS copy. You’re not allowed to come back until you can name at least 6 of the kids*.

*Not true. Please come back…. Please.

Since we really don't have the time right now to go in depth with many of these, we're going to start just posting our off-the-cuff rants. How is that different from our normal posts? I dunno... less pictures.

Living in DC, it’s been my personal pleasure to witness the greatest bandwagoning in the history of mankind. By pleasure, I mean absolute searing pain. At any given Capitals game, what percentage of fans could tell you what the offsides rule is? 10%? 15% maybe?

Sure, there are a few good Capitals fans that followed the team prior to their drafting of Ovi-douche. But only 3 years ago, I received two free tickets for giving blood. That’s right. Two tickets cost one pint of blood. It was the face-value printed on the ticket.

What really irks me is that there is no one here understands how shit-tastic the Southeastern Division really is. The second best team this past year was Atlanta. The f***ing Thrashers were their only competition. I'm pretty sure they're sponsored by Ducksworth, Saver, and Gross.

And don’t get me started on all the bitching Caps fans do about not getting the Winter Classic. You know, the Ducks have a good team, but it’s just to damn warm to play hockey outside there. Unless DC gets another once-every-hundred-years snowstorm every winter, I think ya’ll are just shit out of luck.

Normally, I'd take a swipe at Ovechkin for being a cheap-shot artist. But with all the sucking Ovie does, I'm actually surprised he still has knees left to take out other players.

I will, however, give credit where credit is due. After Game 2 of the 2009 series between the Penguins and the Caps, the following conversation took place:

Caps fan: Hey man, didn’t you guys almost move to Kansas City a few years ago?

C Gally’s friend: Yeah… but we didn’t.

Caps fan: …Touché.

At least ya’ll know when you are beat.

Yeah, it’s been a long week. We haven't posted enough. Let’s get back at it.

In the world of stand-up comedians, your humble editor has two favorites at the moment*: Jim Gaffigan and Louis C.K.

*Note: Not favorites all time, necessarily. I almost wrecked the car when I heard Lewis Black’s first album.

Most people are familiar with Gaffigan. He’s on Comedy Central all the time, and his Hot Pockets bit will be studied for centuries to come.

But for whatever reason, Louis C.K. just isn’t as popular. It’s certainly not because he’s unfunny. Exhibit A (warning, language resembles the WVU alumni section):

See? Awesome. It’s no surprise that FX gave him his own cable show, Louie. And, of course, I was excited.

Then I watched it… Oh lord. It is one steaming piece of hot dumpster garbage.

The show is split between his stand-up and a fictional storyline, with him playing a boring, unfunny version of himself. The stand-up parts are wonderful! The other 80% of the show: borderline unwatchable.

It’s just so disappointing. I mean, Tim Allen is able to have a long-running, successful show. Why can’t one of the funniest men in America make it happen?

I don’t even know who to hate here. Probably myself.

UPDATE: After the jump, Louis CK fan "BK" rants...